Women are often encouraged to have control over their life, and look good while doing it. A little like robots, or barbie dolls. There is that unspoken sense of wrongness, in admitting that trying doing it all is exhausting and impossible. Maybe pointless.
Ever felt like you are drowning in overwhelm, but too ashamed to own up? What will society say? What will happen to women who can’t do it all? It does feel scary to admit. Most women look like they have it all down. Maybe many do, but that wasn’t my story. Constantly stressed about what would happen if I failed to keep all the gunk life shoveled my way. That chin up pose had me melting into a hot mess.
Life got stickier, while I still pretending all was well. Until that day that I couldn’t anymore. You know what I am talking about? Too many denials and silences can bury you.
I had no clue how to be a barbie. I didn’t look like her and I couldn’t find the manual. Throw in teenager in the house, and constant arguing until it all unraveled. It seemed simple enough. I just wanted to enjoy what we had. It wasn’t Rockefeller style, but it was pretty damn good. We ate well, entertained, traveled, had cars, a place to live, freedom. Somehow the good stuff was forgotten in the endless daily battle to get it all done and keep it all together in some pre-programed package.
Frozen in invisible woman paralysis, I had no clue about what I wanted, or how to get out of this ridiculous robot suit. The struggle continued until I realized my relationship with my daughter was too precious to lose to trying to fit in.
I met my moment. No more living the same way, expecting a different result, because it wasn’t working. Have you had such a moment?
What happened? For me it was like starting at the bottom of a steep climb. Along the way I learned a lot, and looking back I wish someone had handed me a checklist before I begun. Which is why I now help women find their deep heart truth.
Getting clear is a series of steps. You can only get clear as the moment allows. Then you travel further and bump up against a new fear. Fear is never going to disappear, but you can work with it. Not every fear is equal or true. Until you begin something new, you will fear it. After a bit of practice, you get comfortable and wonder why you were afraid. And then you try something new.
We fear the unknown. Yet sometimes the unknown holds magic, so entering that space demands confidence. And confidence comes from setting boundaries. Knowing what in your life it is safe to let go of, That release is like a movement, a dance. Once you start you get into a rhythm.
Knowing what you want, feeling safe enough to let go of commitment clutter, and then the overwhelm begins to shrink.
How do you get clear about what matters?
Speak out loud your fears. To a friend or a guide. When my client Sara began asking questions about her planned move we unraveled all kinds of blocks in a reading. She knew something wasn’t right, but she couldn’t put her finger on it till we took it deeper.
Start a journal – writing can reveal deeper layers, hidden way in the back of your mind. Getting a divorce for me was a long process. First I had to admit to myself that I wanted out of my relationship. Writing it down first helped me to get comfortable with the fear.
Carve out sacred time -Get out in nature and absorb the healing. I took long walks with my dog Goldie, some of my clients take up meditation.
Find out more about you – get an astro numerology or soul reading with me, or seek out whatever calls to you. When I started exploring the divination arts I discovered that I was not flawed, just who I am. That was so powerful and freeing.
Joie de Vivre