Liberated or a Caretaker?

“If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time.

But if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us walk together…”

Lilla Watson Australian Aborigine

Reading these words touches a deep place in my heart, because I think a lot of times as women, we think our role is all about helping or fixing others.   Many of us deny our voice and it’s value, to serve.  We doubt our longing for freedom, because we have been conditioned to devalue it.

Shot by Modernus at Mimes #BlogtourLondon

Shot by Modenus at Mimes #BlogtourLondon

Don’t get me wrong.  We are here to serve.  But we serve through being aligned with our deepest self, our soul purpose, and that can only be accomplished by taking care of our self.  By walking our true path, and being connected to our source, and inner wisdom.

I used to shut down the liberating wild loving part of me.  The indulgent gypsy artist, who wanted to finger paint. I knew freedom began with my hands working in tune with my heart. Healing too.  On a deep deep level.   But I leaned in to be part of the tribe I found myself in.   I wanted to belong, and dismissed my need to love me, watering myself down, to become something I wasn’t.

I would sit in class, scared, wondering what they were all talking about.  All the time trying to make sense of it, looking for the words to say that would prove I was one of the in crowd.

You know I never got it right.  People would say I was weird, or funny.  I was both but I never got comfortable enough to own it.  There is no shame in being different.  The only shame is in letting shame rule over that difference.  Now I can laugh with my mockers because I know they don’t judge me, they are just trying to make sense out of my free spirit.  The tables are turned  – in a good way.  Now we both get to be who we are in this moment.

What is worthy of celebrating because it gives you your unique flavor?  When you step into that water, then you can find the strength to love exactly who you are.  There is no need to squash yourself, or to rush into the group to help or save others.  They can do their own saving.  Maybe they need a guide, or a companion.   Perhaps they will form a tribe.   Hopefully you and I can be clan sisters. Using our light and shine to raise our voices, hold hands & skip along to the beat and drum of our own liberation. To be free we do need to be who we are, but that does not mean that you and I need to be carbon copies or believe that each of our beliefs are the only truth.

What liberates you from the social mores of being a charity case?  How will you raise your voice to be heard, while allowing those in your world to have their own space on the path? Share your cries, whispers and knowledge in a comment below.

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Liberated or a Caretaker? — 10 Comments

  1. Yes ready to be your clan sister and walk with you- I love the quote and your words touched a part of my heart that I know is longing to be wild and free, accepting that it is okay to be different. My mother’s voice just came back to me-“Anything to be different!””
    Thanks Jen ?

  2. This was a beautiful post! We are all unique, and I agreed that we need to be comfortable with who we are and not worry what others think or believe. It’s easy to want to fit in and be accepted…but it’s better to be authentic!

  3. How wonderful to be invited to be wild rather than careful, to see caring for ourselves and our needs as legitimate, to appreciate what we have to offer besides merely caring for others. I can feel the power and strength of self you bring to this. I grew up wanting so much to fit in. Being different didn’t feel desirable; more it was something thrust on me, although I didn’t know what exactly was different about me. I love being an adult and being able to explore myself without depending on expectations and traditional standards. Your voice is a balm!

  4. Oh boy! I have tears in my eyes reading this because I can relate to so many aspects of what you wrote. The line that most zinged my heart: “I can laugh with the mockers because I know they don’t judge me, they are just trying to make sense out of my free spirit.” Well said!

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